The Earful – September 2010By Tim Underwood
www.thewebvoice.com
www.thewebvoice.com
“Hi…uh…I’m T-t-t-im…um…nice to meet you (no eye contact)…I thought (quiver in voice) maybe later we could go get a milkshake (uncomfortable pause) or something?”
At the time, I thought it was a brilliant opening.
Of course, I was only 12.
The subject of my affection was Liz, the striking 14-year-old I first spied several days prior, two houses down. I learned she was the granddaughter of one of our neighbors and that she and her family were visiting from out-of-state. After much rumination and palm sweating, I’d finally worked up the nerve to ask her on a “date”.
I was crushed when she said flatly, “no thanks.”
Recently, I had reason to call the corporate offices of Facebook. I was reminded of the Liz debacle after hearing their voice message:
“Hello. You have reached Facebook. If you know your parties extension, you can dial it (maybe he said us, hard to discern) at anytime. (pause…breath)
If you are a user (maybe he thought about contracting you and are into you’re; a slight bobble here) looking for customer care (background conversation audible), please press “1”. (breath)
Otherwise, press “0” for an operator or (awkward hesitation) wait for the tone to (more background jabber) leave a message. Thank you.” (pause…loud phone hang-up)
I hope the corollary here is obvious.
What’s not so obvious is why so many companies neglect to make a good first impression. With no offense meant to the above message-maker, it sounds to me like he drew the short straw at the office and begrudgingly recorded the company message.
Facebook’s company message.
The same Facebook that boasts on the Career page of their Web site: “We're a cutting-edge technology company..."
Really?
Based solely on their phone greeting, I’d liken them to a startup operating out of an apartment being run by a guy named Mike who had the TV on while recording said greeting.
If yours is truly a “cutting-edge company”, then why is the voice of your company that of a somewhat been-there-done-that-kind-of-boring guy?
What you’ve inadvertently impressed upon your customer is that yours is a been-there-done-that-kind-of-boring company.
And we all know that’s not Facebook.
Here’s another earful:
Suppose your company is a high-end jewelry store. The display cases are immaculate and filled with stunning elegance; your logo reflects impeccable quality and sophistication; your salespeople are perfectly groomed and meticulous in their service.
And then there’s your phone message, cheerfully and unprofessionally voiced by Madison.
Madison is the owner’s daughter. Her voice is somewhat high-pitched and she’s somewhat young. Not that I’m against young women with high-pitched voices, though hers is a voice I would associate more with a cheerful barista rather than an alluring salesperson.
Jewelry is somewhat sexy. Coffee is somewhat not.
Madison’s only qualification for the job of company “spokesperson”?
She's the boss’s daughter. She’s not a professional voice talent.
How’s your company greeting its customers? Is the first impression you bestow that of a bashful youth standing on a front porch? Or is it a voice that’s an extension of your company’s image - reinforcing the brand you’ve worked so hard to embellish.
We currently embellish the images of everyone from BendBroadband to BMW and would like the opportunity to buff up your company’s first impression.
Call TheWebVoice.com toll-free at 1-877-284-7876.
PS - True story. I recently found Liz on Facebook and wrote her a short note. I knew it was a brilliant opening - much better than the one 30 years ago.
She “friended” me almost immediately.
Of course, I was only 12.
The subject of my affection was Liz, the striking 14-year-old I first spied several days prior, two houses down. I learned she was the granddaughter of one of our neighbors and that she and her family were visiting from out-of-state. After much rumination and palm sweating, I’d finally worked up the nerve to ask her on a “date”.
I was crushed when she said flatly, “no thanks.”
Recently, I had reason to call the corporate offices of Facebook. I was reminded of the Liz debacle after hearing their voice message:
“Hello. You have reached Facebook. If you know your parties extension, you can dial it (maybe he said us, hard to discern) at anytime. (pause…breath)
If you are a user (maybe he thought about contracting you and are into you’re; a slight bobble here) looking for customer care (background conversation audible), please press “1”. (breath)
Otherwise, press “0” for an operator or (awkward hesitation) wait for the tone to (more background jabber) leave a message. Thank you.” (pause…loud phone hang-up)
I hope the corollary here is obvious.
What’s not so obvious is why so many companies neglect to make a good first impression. With no offense meant to the above message-maker, it sounds to me like he drew the short straw at the office and begrudgingly recorded the company message.
Facebook’s company message.
The same Facebook that boasts on the Career page of their Web site: “We're a cutting-edge technology company..."
Really?
Based solely on their phone greeting, I’d liken them to a startup operating out of an apartment being run by a guy named Mike who had the TV on while recording said greeting.
If yours is truly a “cutting-edge company”, then why is the voice of your company that of a somewhat been-there-done-that-kind-of-boring guy?
What you’ve inadvertently impressed upon your customer is that yours is a been-there-done-that-kind-of-boring company.
And we all know that’s not Facebook.
Here’s another earful:
Suppose your company is a high-end jewelry store. The display cases are immaculate and filled with stunning elegance; your logo reflects impeccable quality and sophistication; your salespeople are perfectly groomed and meticulous in their service.
And then there’s your phone message, cheerfully and unprofessionally voiced by Madison.
Madison is the owner’s daughter. Her voice is somewhat high-pitched and she’s somewhat young. Not that I’m against young women with high-pitched voices, though hers is a voice I would associate more with a cheerful barista rather than an alluring salesperson.
Jewelry is somewhat sexy. Coffee is somewhat not.
Madison’s only qualification for the job of company “spokesperson”?
She's the boss’s daughter. She’s not a professional voice talent.
How’s your company greeting its customers? Is the first impression you bestow that of a bashful youth standing on a front porch? Or is it a voice that’s an extension of your company’s image - reinforcing the brand you’ve worked so hard to embellish.
We currently embellish the images of everyone from BendBroadband to BMW and would like the opportunity to buff up your company’s first impression.
Call TheWebVoice.com toll-free at 1-877-284-7876.
PS - True story. I recently found Liz on Facebook and wrote her a short note. I knew it was a brilliant opening - much better than the one 30 years ago.
She “friended” me almost immediately.
